Bursting the Vandy Bubble: The Go Getter Socialite

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-->On the hand holding an iPhone, she’s Vice President of Public Relations for her sorority and deciding if she should take a job at Calvin Klein or Saks 5^th Avenue. On the other hand holding a glass of wine, she’s laughing with her friends and deciding which bar will draw the most athletes tonight. She’s the Vandy Go Getter Socialite, and if the bloggers at betcheslovethis.com were to meet her, she would be in their crowd faster than she could bat her lash extensions.

 

According to the Head Betches, you may not know the word, but you know the girl. “She's the one who has everything figured out. Everything she associates with is trendy, every guy she interacts with wants to date her and every girl she meets is desperate to be her friend. She speaks her mind and commands a room just by being in it…A betch is often confused with a bitch but make no mistake, they're different. A betch isn't just mean for no reason like a bitch is. She's edgy. Haters and nice people may label us 'narcissistic' but a betch knows that believing in herself is all it takes for everyone else to believe in her.” 

 

Ultimately, what the betches have created is a caricature of college girls who are on the road to get what they want, whether that’s the job of their dreams or just a Birkin bag. According to them, she’ll work her toned butt off to get either one – and there’s no judgment as to which is more important. The betches peruse topics through the betch list, which include important betchy things like diet coke, twitter, naps, themed parties, all things British and yoga.  They also lend their spicy commentary in reviews of celebrity culture, TV and movies. Columns like Betches Love This College and Betches Love This City, as well as a guy advice column called Ask a Pro provide more laughs for their sassy audience. 

Admittedly, Betcheslovethis is funny, and it rings true with lots of Vandy girls, but when you sit down with the aforementioned Vandy betch, even she knows that the Betches are less reality and more reality TV:

“I can appreciate the fact that they post about accurate things, but I see it more as funny than real. You know that what they are saying isn’t that serious when it comes to actual life. You might relate to the post, but you know at the end of the day that there’s more to your life than iced coffee, boys and tanning. I mean, you may like all of those things, but people are more dynamic and have so many more sides. That may a small part of who you are and what you enjoy but it’s not the whole person.”

     

Betches often talk about the importance of Greek life as a social climbing opportunity. However, this Vandy Go Getter Socialite sees Greek life as much more. “In terms of sororities at Vanderbilt and girls who care about Greek life, they’re often leaders in their houses and responsible for a lot more than people realize. They’re running big organizations and even though it might sound cliché, they are creating a sisterhood. Yea, it happens that a big part of sororities are superficial, but we are raising money for causes that are important and we are making an impact on campus.”  

And she claims that the socialite reputation may need deeper digging as well. “I think the whole socialite, going out, partying aspect is an escape from the pressure of going to such a hard school and bigger challenges we’re dealing with. We’re working our asses off studying, looking for jobs or internships and doing thing we are passionate about our. We really do care about our futures, the world, and the communities around us. So I think the socialite aspect is kind of an escape in a sense.”

When pushed a little harder on whether or not the betchy lifestyle is damaging, the GGS (pardon the betchy abrriev) says, “I think betches is bad in the sense that it’s a stereotype and people put labels on you that may or may not be true. It’s also bad in terms of getting a job and starting a career. If you embody all of the qualities they talk about, you’ll come across as ignorant and arrogant. People will be able to see that there’s no depth to you.”

However, she does think that there are positive qualities to the message that the betches offer: “Some of the posts are very much about how girls can get the job down if they are not afraid to do what they need to do. It can definitely be taken too far, but in some instances, a bit of confidence can go a long way.”

Ultimately, the Socialite Go Getter breaks the Vandy bubble in that she wants success, but for reasons that the betches would never consider:  “Career wise, I want to be in PR and marketing. I want to successful and I realize that’s part of the betch mentality. But at the same time I want to have a life – get married, have kids, give back to the community. Giving back to the community is really what I want to do, but I’m not sure how yet. I hope to become successful in order to give back.”  

To me, that mentality is quite the opposite from a direct quote from the definition of betch: “We’re the girls born with the silver spoon in our mouths. But like, fuck silver, we want gold.”